i just want to conquer people and their souls

Well readers, here it is: the final installment of my epic Travel Tips: Tasmania Edition . In this final post, I will guide you through the lower portions of this fine state.   If you'd like to catch up, I suggest you read parts one and two first. So, on to the Tips. After the loitering miscreants of The Spirit of Tasmania , the speeding bogans of Davonport and the various other human flotsam and jetsam we had encountered in the north of Tasmania, its capital city, Hobart, seemed as glamorous as Monte Carlo. See what I mean? There were shops, cafes and people wearing pants! I would suggest packing your fancy flip flops... just in case. To add to the general feeling of hateur, my brother and I immediately decided to pronounce Hobart in our own ways, as a sort of homage to this fair city. I decided to capitalize on the fact that everyone was already greeting me with the respect and adoration universally shown to Americans abroad and pronounce it Hoeburrt , really taking c...

Howdy, readers. School holidays are coming up, so I thought it might be prudent to return to a little feature here at ijustwanttoconquerpeopleandtheirsouls that I like to call Travel Tips. This is a place for me to pass on the hidden gems that I have discovered throughout my voyages. Loyal readers will remember that the inaugural Travel Tips post was a guide to the wonder that is the Paris Sewer System . As a nod to the Financial Crisis, I thought I'd keep it domestic this time. Just because you don't have any dinero doesn't mean you can't have a good time . With that, I present to you Veronica Montebellucci's guide to Austin, Texas! Now, I will just put this out there: Austin is no Big D, little a, double L, A, S. Unfortunately, there aren't so many women who look like this: Instead, there seem to be more girls that look like this*: Really, Austin? I know you like to keep it "weird" but I can see this kind of shit in Williamsburg and that ...