I recently broke my own vow to myself and partook in the cinematic "event" that was "Avatar". I knew before I went in that it would be some sort of James Cameron vanity project, but the lure of 3D vision was too great. Those red and green lenses beckoned like sirens, propelling me back to the days of my beloved View Master. An aside: Sadly, my View Master was responsible for the slow and painful deaths of many a good man. The Beaverton factory where they were made was build atop a toxic waste dump . Fellow children of the 80s and possibly 90s WE HAVE BLOOD ON OUR HANDS!!!Beaverton blood, no less. Anyhoo, I went to my local theatre (Park Slope Pavillion, holla!), and was immediately disappointed to find that they had done away with my favorite Downs Syndrome ticket ripper. Now, just wait a goddamn minute Judgey McSneer. I didn't look down on this young man. He made me feel good. The joy he demonstrated upon each rip was an unparalleled delight in a service ...