Last night, myself, my wife and an assortment of my very best (ie. not inept or at all annoying) coworkers wined and dined in the "Board Room" of
Delmonicos. How did they allow a ragtag team of deviants in to such a fine establishment? Why it was
Restaurant Week, of course!For the uninitiated, Restaurant Week is the time of the year when fancy places open their doors to plebes like me and offer deep discounts on what would otherwise be prices roughly equivalent to my monthly living expenses.
After a delightful meal,I removed my improvised napkin bib and decided to pony up and pay the $5 surcharge for the Baked Alaska. Oh boy was it worth it. As I descended in to a meringue-induced frenzy, our helpful waiter alerted us to the fact that we were dining in the birthplace of the Baked Alaska. That's right, you read correctly: I was experiencing my first BA in its very womb. It was so meta that I almost couldn't take it. This isn't the only "first" in Delmonicos' history. According to their website, Delmonicos had plenty of firsts, including:
• The first diner where guests sat at their own tables
• The first printed menu
• The first tablecloths
• The first debutante ball outside a private home
• The first restaurant to offer a leisurely lunch and dinner
• Oysters Rockefeller
• Lobster Newberg, first called Lobster Wenberg
• Baked Alaska
• Eggs Benedict
• Delmonico potatoes
• Delmonico steak
• Hamburger (known then as the Hamburg Steak)
I call bullshit on at least 75 percent of these. Why do you gotta be like that Delmonicos? Why can't you just be humble and claim only the Baked Alaska?
The "first restaurant to offer a leisurely lunch and dinner" is my personal favorite.Just because you put "Delmonicos" before a food item doesn't make it new and original. Delmonico steak? Really? Also, tablecloths? Come on! No one ever thought to drape a piece of cloth over a table before? Why do you turn somewhere so awesome in to a house of lies?
Despite Delmonicos' delusions of grandeur,they did create my new official dessert, and for that we should all be grateful.